Well, somebody demanded me to write up something for the ICCF blog. So when instructed by a 'representative' of God, I cannot say no - because if I do, I openly disrespect the power of His name. LOL. No offense brother!Its a learning point that so many use His name in vain nowadays we really need to be careful with our 'Godly' speeches.This is probably one of the reasons why I seldom and hardly ever mention much about God directly in my daily conversations, even amongst conversations with fellow believers of the faith. Well, the fear of misusing, misrepresenting, or simply saying that God is behind this and that is in my opinion, not worthy of my opinions! If God is behind something - that is up to Him, not me. And if so, I will be so cursed if I were to declare in lieu of His glory and power! So, as most old texts would say in my own words - it is wiser to remain silent than to spew out a mouthful of crap.
Well, its not that I don't believe that God actually does have His hands in just about everything. I don't need to believe, because He IS in the middle of just about everything that I could phantom. How? I would love to explain, but that might require me to write a whole book - Well, lets push that on for a future topic for now.
What I was thinking of sharing for the guys or just about any Christian today is, well - like the title says: The Truths of Reality. As a Chinese businessman would say that business seriously kills, life seriously kills too. It just so happened that I was stopping by Blessed Church last evening and Ps. GT Lim happened to be preaching about Joseph and how God was behind everything regardless how bad things could become. Before he shared his message, he was sharing about several personal experiences of dealing with 'hurt' people, as I would term in general.
In this account, he was speaking about innocent young teenagers being put in certain circumstances leading to serious abuse in virtually any aspect imaginable. It was very painful to even listen to such a testimony as he described the details of the events of each victim - I had to close my eyes several times as I held back my tears (Well, its not so much about being emo - but when you had first hand experience to feel and listen what these innocent children had to go through, as they choke to let out the horrible truths - You'd be a monster if you could listen to it and not be moved - and what more if you belonged to the opposite gender, whom could be the only 'kind' to perpetrate such a hideous crime).
And that was the complication of it. I won't describe the details of how I know this - but the human being is a much more horrible creature that it seems to most of us. The kind of things we can do to one another is truly unimaginable. The worst that animals do is to devour their own kind. We on the other hand - are too intelligent for our own good. I was reading up on the Nanking Massacre (It is well known under a more explicit title for what the massacre was mostly about), and you would be left speechless. When Ps. Lim said that even he did not have an answer to deal with such questions (for crimes like those I mentioned above), I felt assured it was not because I was not equipped well enough when I first had to deal with it. I used to think that I was not ready to deal with such things in the past maybe because I did not have proper training, or enough maturity or experience to understand such victims. But Ps. Lim was right - there is seriously no human answer to this. We just can't.
I could still remember the vivid memories where I just sat on the chair years ago with a victim sitting across the table - completely speechless, staring blankly across. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know how I could help. All I knew was that - I couldn't. It was one of the most painful experiences in my life - but I was instructed to 'burn this image into your memories' so I could identify them in the future. Yes - this drove me to divulge more into psychology - in an attempt to try to understand the horrid creatures we are. After a long pause, I knew the only thing I could say was, "I'm sorry." Honestly - there was nothing much else I could do. I had no right to try to explain the incident - I had no right to try to comfort the victim. I belonged to the same 'tribe' of the criminals! Imagine the helplessness and despair involved!
As I desperately searched for an answer in just about everything with regards to human behavior, in books, journals, articles, online discussions and more - I found the horrible answer to it all - that it was our very own twisted nature of our minds that we could conceive such horrible thoughts and to be able to actually perform them on another person and actually derive pleasure out of tormenting another. And what more worse to realise that the boundaries between pain and pleasure is that fine (Even in scientific research, pain and pleasure are derived from similar pulses and have somewhat similar signatures - that's why some people can actually learn to enjoy pain). So is are the boundaries between good and evil - I was appalled at the idea that I could, and would be able to actually perform something similar to what I looked up - but I had to accept the bitter truth that it was true. That my own thoughts in my attempts to help could have been easily twisted into one of sadistic torture.
And its true - only God could possibly open up a path to healing. I seriously thank Him for leading me and giving me the words to speak (Though I screwed up a lot too - I was very immature comparatively at this point in time) which well - eventually helped to a certain extent. The healing process is long, tedious, and extremely painful especially when the memories continue to plague our minds - Its been so long, and I hope one day - He will be able to stamp my report as "Completed".
There are many more horrible things happening in the society today. Even the word 'horrible' gives the Truth much discount of the realities that are unfolding behind out streets. We want to help and instigate change, but yet we can't. Somehow, we cannot do anything about it at this point in time. All we can do is to equip and prepare ourselves for the true battle in reality and leave the rest to Him who will fight the spiritual battle for us. I understand that many of us grew up in protected homes, hidden from the calamities of humanity. One day - as we continue to grow and eventually leave the protection of our families, friends, churches, school, college and university - and when we have nobody else standing beside us as we stand by the gates of hell - what will we do?
And that explains a part of me a little bit more - to why I keep emphasizing why personal development is so important. Why we need to be the real deal. Why Christians have no excuse to be 'normal' people if their God is the Highest of the Highest. We will never know when we might be put to the test. We will never know when our next breath might be out last. We may never know when everything we have been trained for the past 20 years of our life has been a preparation for that one-time shot at glory. Therefore, while you still have the opportunity - brace yourselves - and prepare for the worst. The world is only going to get worse. And its only inevitable that the good will get better! With God or not, being more capable, knowing a little bit more, and being a little stronger will be for your own good.
Take heed, for time will eventually draw to an end. Its time to get serious with our lives.
Dezs
