Hello everyone, yes these are one of the times where I get slackly again, just got back from Chinese New Year holiday, so forgive me for not posting anything during the previous weeks, but redeem it by sharing you this meaningful testimony by Fr Terry Burke on drawing ourselves nearer to God:
When I was newly ordained, the Catholic Chaplain at Wadsworth Jail, in London, asked me if I would supply for him, while he was in holiday and I agreed. My daily rounds at the prison included a visit to the hospital wing and, one morning, the warder in charge told me that there was a prisoner in the padded cell. He had become very violent due, due, I think, to withdrawal from drugs, and they had strapped him in a strait jacket and locked him in the padded cell. I asked the warder if I could go into the cell and he said I could, for the man had quiet down, so I unlocked the cell door and went in.
The man, in his middle 20's, stood up, when I came in, and seemed very pleased to see me and as there ware no seats, we sat on the floor to talk. I was very nervous, for that was my first time in such a situation and, at first, I paid much more attention wondering how quickly I could get to the door should he become violent, than listening to what he was saying. But slowly his words began to register.
He was, I gathered, a Catholic, although not a religious man. He told me of his awful experience the night before, when he had become completely out of control, throwing himself at the wall and floor screaming and in terror- and with no power to stop himself. "I was in hell, Father!" he said, "really and truly in hell." But as I sat listening to him, it became obvious that something else had also happen to him during that terrible long night, for he said to me, "But, I have told God, that if he will use my sufferings to bring healing to some poor sick child, then I am willing to go through it again." Somehow, in the darkness of that night and in the lack of all that we usually associate with the presence of God, this young man had met God.
In spirituality, this is sometimes called, 'the dark night of the soul', and is described in *apophatic theology as coming to know God by what he is not. In our religious services, we rarely come up against this way of meeting God; we concentrate instead on being inspired by beauty in ritual, music and readings. However, there are one or two places in our liturgy, where we approach God in this way - Holy Thursday evening comes to mind, when the altars are stripped and the tabernacle stands empty with its doors flung wide. That emptiness can bring u into very intimate union with the Christ, who is not there!
All of us, at some time during our life journey will experience this 'dark night of the soul' in some way. A very common forms the experience of 'dryness' in prayer times, when there is no enjoyment in our prayer or religious duties. At such times, there is a great temptation to judge prayer as being no use, because we experience no benefit from it. But this darkness is an essential part of our spiritual journey as it was also part of Jesus' spiritual journey when, for instance, he cried out on the cross, "God, my God why have you forsaken me?" This cry of Jesus, like the cry of that young man in Wandsworth Jail, is not a turning away from God, but is, in fact, a profound act of faith- a reaching for God in the 'nothingness'
You and I will probably never go through the experience of that young man in Wandsworth Jail. Our dark night is far more likely to be boredom in prayer, but the temptation to turn away from God may be very great. At such times, we stand on the threshold of knowing God at a much deeper level. That young man turned to God at a time, when many would sat God could not be there - and in reaching for God in the darkness he found a compassion for sick children, which brought him into the heart of God. Our choice may not have so dramatic a form, but it will be the same basic choice - do I turn away or embrace the darkness? There will be the temptation to turn away, but as St Peter said: "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life" (John 6:68)
*Apophatic Theology - also known as Negative Theory, is a theory that attempts to describe God. the Divine God, by negation, to speak only in terms of what may not be said about the perfect goodness that is God.
Fr Terry Burke is a Mill Hill Missionary who has served in Sarawak, , India and England. Currently, he is Chaplain to the International Catholic Community in Bali, but comes to Kuching each year to teach at St Peter's College.
Hope you all can learn from Fr Terry Burke's testimony, may God bless you all
Love,
Lionel
When I was newly ordained, the Catholic Chaplain at Wadsworth Jail, in London, asked me if I would supply for him, while he was in holiday and I agreed. My daily rounds at the prison included a visit to the hospital wing and, one morning, the warder in charge told me that there was a prisoner in the padded cell. He had become very violent due, due, I think, to withdrawal from drugs, and they had strapped him in a strait jacket and locked him in the padded cell. I asked the warder if I could go into the cell and he said I could, for the man had quiet down, so I unlocked the cell door and went in.
The man, in his middle 20's, stood up, when I came in, and seemed very pleased to see me and as there ware no seats, we sat on the floor to talk. I was very nervous, for that was my first time in such a situation and, at first, I paid much more attention wondering how quickly I could get to the door should he become violent, than listening to what he was saying. But slowly his words began to register.
He was, I gathered, a Catholic, although not a religious man. He told me of his awful experience the night before, when he had become completely out of control, throwing himself at the wall and floor screaming and in terror- and with no power to stop himself. "I was in hell, Father!" he said, "really and truly in hell." But as I sat listening to him, it became obvious that something else had also happen to him during that terrible long night, for he said to me, "But, I have told God, that if he will use my sufferings to bring healing to some poor sick child, then I am willing to go through it again." Somehow, in the darkness of that night and in the lack of all that we usually associate with the presence of God, this young man had met God.
In spirituality, this is sometimes called, 'the dark night of the soul', and is described in *apophatic theology as coming to know God by what he is not. In our religious services, we rarely come up against this way of meeting God; we concentrate instead on being inspired by beauty in ritual, music and readings. However, there are one or two places in our liturgy, where we approach God in this way - Holy Thursday evening comes to mind, when the altars are stripped and the tabernacle stands empty with its doors flung wide. That emptiness can bring u into very intimate union with the Christ, who is not there!
All of us, at some time during our life journey will experience this 'dark night of the soul' in some way. A very common forms the experience of 'dryness' in prayer times, when there is no enjoyment in our prayer or religious duties. At such times, there is a great temptation to judge prayer as being no use, because we experience no benefit from it. But this darkness is an essential part of our spiritual journey as it was also part of Jesus' spiritual journey when, for instance, he cried out on the cross, "God, my God why have you forsaken me?" This cry of Jesus, like the cry of that young man in Wandsworth Jail, is not a turning away from God, but is, in fact, a profound act of faith- a reaching for God in the 'nothingness'
You and I will probably never go through the experience of that young man in Wandsworth Jail. Our dark night is far more likely to be boredom in prayer, but the temptation to turn away from God may be very great. At such times, we stand on the threshold of knowing God at a much deeper level. That young man turned to God at a time, when many would sat God could not be there - and in reaching for God in the darkness he found a compassion for sick children, which brought him into the heart of God. Our choice may not have so dramatic a form, but it will be the same basic choice - do I turn away or embrace the darkness? There will be the temptation to turn away, but as St Peter said: "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life" (John 6:68)
-Fr Terry Burke
*Apophatic Theology - also known as Negative Theory, is a theory that attempts to describe God. the Divine God, by negation, to speak only in terms of what may not be said about the perfect goodness that is God.
Fr Terry Burke is a Mill Hill Missionary who has served in Sarawak, , India and England. Currently, he is Chaplain to the International Catholic Community in Bali, but comes to Kuching each year to teach at St Peter's College.
Hope you all can learn from Fr Terry Burke's testimony, may God bless you all
Love,
Lionel
